Weekend Box Office Roundup

Wow, I cannot believe $31 million worth of you people actually went to see this crap over the weekend. I mean, I like Vince Vaugh and Reese Witherspoon individually, but they belong on-screen together about as much as Michael Jackson and Naomi Campbell in the In the Closet video. Is it just me or is there something troublesome about watching Michael Jackson in a wife beater with his hair pulled back screech “There’s something about ya baaaaaby, that makes me want to give it to youuuuuuu!!” Regardless, Four Christmases blazed the contemporary rom-com schlock trail of What Happens In Vegas to the tune of $31.8 million this weekend. And it’s a good thing too, since Warner Brothers somehow felt the need to spend a budget of $80 million to make a Christmas comedy about two yuppies visiting their families. Add another (let’s be conservative) $60 million for advertising, and Four Christmases should turn a profit once it rakes in about another $240 million. And who says the Hollywood studio business model is broken?

Let’s see, what else do we have?

The latest in the James Bond saga, Quantum of Solace, brought in another cool $20 mil despite having a storyline about as engaging as a pamphlet on venereal disease. I dug Daniel Craig in Casino Royale, but making a movie set in Bolivia with Vladimir Radmonavich as your villain does not make for a successful follow-up. And please, for god’s sakes, no more Bond girls with shoulder length hair. It just doesn’t work.

This weekend’s other big release was Australia, starring the World’s Sexiest Closeted Gay Guy, Hugh Jackman.

Australia’s first weekend box office take? $14 million.

Australia’s budget cost? $130 million.

Somebody at Fox is getting fired.

Other than that, Milk brought in a respectable $36,000 per screen in limited release, proving that there is an audience to watch Sean Penn and James Franco make out and Transporter 3 banked another $12 million proving that Jason Statham looks just like my friend and X 17 Poster Boy, Justin Mandile. Just thought I’d throw that out there.