Bring Back the NBA on NBC!

On the surface, tomorrow’s Christmas Day showdown between the Lakers and the defending champion Boston Celtics has everything a basketball fan could ask for. A rematch of last year’s NBA Finals and a renewal of professional sport’s most storied rivalry, with both teams at the head of their respective conferences on a collision course for another Finals confrontation. This game has it all: rivalry, tension, history, hatred, excitement. But there’s one thing this matinee battle doesn’t have: The “NBA on NBC” theme song.

Any b-ball fan growing up in the 80’s and 90’s vividly remembers a cherished ritual performed every weekend and holiday day. Wake up and plop down in front of the television as you wait for the hairs on the back of your neck to stand up as you turn on NBC and listen to broadcasting Messiah Bob Costas launch into a quick oral history of whatever two teams were about to play set against a stirring montage of slow-motion on-court images. By the end of Costas’ monologue you could cut the tension with a knife and feel the inspiration nearly levitating you out of your seat.

Then it hits you with the force of an overhand right from Ivan Drago after a steriod injection: Kaboom! Duh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh du-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh duh-nuh-nuh! Yes, the “NBA on NBC” theme song. A 32-second opus of bombast that ranks somewhere between “Eye of the Tiger” and “You’re the Best Around” on the list of motivational sports music. The trumpet-laden ditty was evidently composed by Entertainment Tonight anchor and Blow-Dried Hair Club for Men President John Tesh.

Unfortunately, ABC outbid NBC for NBA broadcasting rights in 2002 and sports television has never fully recovered. Like all Laker fans, I will be fully immersed in the moment come game time tomorrow, but in the back of my mind, I will know the experience is incomplete. Where’s John Tesh when you need him?

Here are a few classic NBA on NBC intros:

Rockets vs. Knicks 1994 NBA Finals Game 7

Suns vs. Bulls 1993 NBA Finals Game 6 (widely regarded as Costas’ greatest intro ever)

Knicks vs. Pacers Eastern Conference Finals Game 3

Bulls vs. Lakers NBA Finals Game 3

Heart of a Champion My Ass

I just watched the Lakers blow a 16-point lead in the 4th quarter to the Pacers. Anyone who’s ever watched a Laker game with me is convinced I need to be institutionalized, so you can imagine what this did to me. I’m sorry, but these Lakers, while immensely talented, are still cocky and lazy. This team blows a 20-point lead quicker than Jena Jameson. They play defense for about 8 minutes and then think their job is done. It’s disgusting.

I’m starting to wonder if the problem starts at the top? We all think of Kobe Bryant as the fiercest competitor in the game, but did you see him play defense tonight???? I sure as hell didn’t. The guy had to have given up 30 points himself off bad gambles that didn’t work out and not picking up open shooters. I know it’s only one loss, but these guys sure as hell don’t look like champs. Especially not with Boston tearing up the East.

I don’t want to doubt Kobe, but if he can’t take this team to 65-wins and a title, I can’t think of him in the same breath as the all-time greats. This team is loaded. Compare who Kobe’s got (Gasol, Bynum, Odom, Fisher, Ariza, Radmanovic, Farmar) with the garbage team that Michael Jordan had surrounding him during his last 2 years in Chicago. It’s not even close. Kobe, get your act together.